English Headlines

One thing that I like about English newspaper is their'creativity' with the headlines. Especially with football headlines. With Manchester United new signings, Ji-Sung Park,Edwin Van Der Sar, and last season purchase, Dong Fangzhou, and Gerard Pique, some members of the redcafe.net, predicted some hillarious headlines that involves these players.

Note:
Bellend and Dong is an English slank for male genitalia.
Ding is an English slank for shoot
Upton Park is West Ham home stadium

Example:
When Ji-SungPark skins West Ham - Park Stroll At Upton!

When Ruud van Nistelrooy delivers his first Hattrick - Ruud Awakening!

When Dong Fangzhou makes his debut - Massive Dong!

When Pique gives an impressive performance - Gerard reaches Pique Form!

When Van der Sar turns in a blinder - United Sar-vives!

If Ji-Sung Park has been playing well then is dropped - Park Benched

If Gary Neville scoring the winning goal in the champions league final - Its the Neville ending story

If Fergie says Phil Neville should play for England instead of Gary to avoid injuries to the older brother - Better the Neville you sold than the Neville you don't

If Dong Fangzhou scores a winner away at Man City - Ding Dong at the Bell End